Category Archives: Off-Topic

Started something new this week.

I’ve started a small new place for my thoughts to reside, which aren’t necessarily related to Linux. Visit my new blog about coding and such called importflying, totally infected with malware. It’s somewhere I’ll do nothing with for months. 🙂

Same style of humor and writing as you’ve always enjoyed at Fsckin w/ Linux, but a totally different topic. It just feels like there’s not a lot to write about anymore, because I’m able to find the answers I look for pretty easily.

The Most Interesting README File Ever?

Another linux zealot at my old job gave me the heads up on this, it’s directly from gnome-cups-manager, and I thought you would all enjoy it. If you’re not aware, the readme file is for a Gnome graphical front-end for a tool used to manage print queues and adding printers/etc.

The only question is what illicit substances were not consumed during the writing of this file.


Once upon a time there was a printer who lived in the woods. He was a lonely printer, because nobody knew how to configure him. He hoped and hoped for someone to play with.

One day, the wind passed by the printer’s cottage. “Whoosh,” said the wind. The printer became excited. Maybe the wind would be his friend!

“Will you be my friend?” the printer asked.
Continue reading The Most Interesting README File Ever?

I’m Now Writing for Ars Technica Open Ended

Big news… really really big breaking news…

Starting today, I’m writing daily news blurbs for the Ars Technica Open Ended news-oriented journal about Linux and open source in general. I’ve been wanting to do something like this for quite some time, since the Ars name brings along with it some credibility and respect from the community.

I’m not stopping the presses, they’re just rolling somewhere else a little bit faster. I’m not going to stop posting articles here, and trust me – there are some things I’ve written about that Ars wouldn’t ever think of publishing in a million years… a quick search concludes that I’m not always the most politically correct blogger around – I don’t try to be someone I’m not, but just for Ars, I’ll try to clean up my act a little bit. 🙂

That said, there are a limited amount of hours for me to write, and I’ve wanted to be a part of something bigger – and I have achieved that goal. I hope you’ll congratulate me and follow to the new digs.

I kinda think they have a better web designer than myself.. right?
Continue reading I’m Now Writing for Ars Technica Open Ended

I Was Rickrolled by a TTY Relay Operator

There is a first time for everything. Like calling Microsoft on April Fools’ Day to help uninstall Linux.

I’d like to share what happened earlier today: I received a TTY Relay call. Relay calls happen all the time, but this one is special… I was RickRolled by someone who is deaf or mute. Perhaps they just called via relay as a joke. Anyway, it was seriously the highlight of my week, and I think it’s the first time someone has been RickRolled by TTY relay.

Here’s a rough transcript of how it happened, enjoy:

Cellphone rings… [weird 5-digit number calling]…I answer.

Me: Hello, this is Wayne.

Operator: This is relay operator 7852, I have a relay call for you. Have you ever received a relay call before?

Me: Yes I have, hello, go ahead.

Operator: Hello… I just watched your video about the Linux and the Rickroll, don’t ever make a stupid video like that again, I just wasted 10 minutes.  Go ahead.

Me: [Sigh] [Laughing really hard] ah ga oh man, you’ve made my day (happy tone) Go ahead.

Operator: Seriously, what a loser! Go ahead.

Me: [Laughing] Ohhhh man, you’ve made my day! Go ahead.

Operator: Ok but I just wanna tell you one more thing that I’m never gonna give you up, never gonna let you down, never gonna run around and desert you, never gonna make you cry, never gonna say goodbye, never gonna tell a lie and hurt you. Go ahead.

Me: [Laughing] Ah that was really good, thank you.  Have a good day.  Go ahead. *hangs up*

Go ahead indeed! Well played, sir!  Edit:  The guy who did it was kind enough to contact me, and “SirGeek” sent along an email with the transcript as proof:

Hi. That were me. I attached an image for proof. Note that I really did love the video, I just wanted to see how far the operator would read off some insults before I got my ‘roll on 😛 So no harm intended.

I would have used my cellphone, but I couldn’t find the damn thing.

F**king brilliant.

While I’m waiting on Direct2Drive to Download 6GB of Data for COD4

…it is probably going to take all night… I just HAD to try out COD4 after Yahtzee’s most excellent quote of being “a pretty excellent gun wank.” Sigh. I watched that review and immediately headed over to the WineHQ to check the status of the game, and it seems to play very well under Wine. I’d be able to write an article AND play an excellent gun wank at the same time, so that’d be a win-win. So I went ahead and purchased it immediately.

In the meantime, here’s a picture of my most recent “computer” upgrade… the most excellent Mirra Chair by Herman Miller. Since the ~24 hours after owning this chair most of my dull and nagging lower-back pain have completely disappeared.

I highly recommend the chair and there’s not much more I can say about the Mirra other than the fact that it’s marginally more comfortable than the Aeron I used 40 hours a week for 2 years when I worked for a company that spoiled all of it’s employees with Aeron-goodness during the DotCom Bubble. Also, the aesthetics of the non-mesh back appeal to me, which is a side-bonus. I don’t care if the chair looks like it’s 45 years old, and has sagging nockers that have been used to breastfeed a baker’s dozen of really, really thirsty babies, as long as it makes my back more comfortable, that is all that matters.
Continue reading While I’m waiting on Direct2Drive to Download 6GB of Data for COD4

Microsoft to Yahoo – “We Will Add Your Biological And Technological Distinctiveness To Our Own.”

I’ve gotta give Steve Ballmer and crew a pat on the back. The Microsoft acquisition offer for Yahoo is the most fantastic idea they have come up with since the release of Vista. Unfortunately, Microhoo is not going to topple the top player Google anytime soon in the online advertising world.

You can’t take Microsoft, add Yahoo juice and get something magically better. Microsoft and Yahoo have relatively poor search results when compared to Google. Combined, they also do not have anywhere near the online advertising inventory that Google has available. Google dominates the online office suite (at the moment) with Google Docs, which is what I think got Microsoft on their case.

According to the WSJ, Yahoo is going to reject the offer on Monday. I speculate that Microsoft would raise their offer to $40 a share, they’ll do anything to be second best.

Is It Just Me, Or Does Sun Comes Off As A Creepy Uncle?

I got an email from a professor today asking for some input on Java and Solaris… 15-20 minutes of my time is not asking much… but it seems like Sun is the type of guy who is offering some candy from the sliding door of a panel van…

We are inviting you to provide feedback and input by participating in this survey. We are offering a chance to win one of 4 American Express gift cards, each in the amount of US$50. We anticipate you allocating fifteen to twenty minutes to complete the relevant sections. The deadline for completion is February 5th.

Our objective is to better understand the following:

* What is your experience so far with Java and Solaris courses?
* What is your opinion of the books and other courseware available?
* Do you plan to work in a field using Java or Solaris after graduation?
* What do you know about professional certification?


To Catch A Content Theif

I’ve been running Vista for about a week – because Unreal Tournament 3 hasn’t released a Linux client yet. Don’t worry, you aren’t missing very much! Since there’s no Linux server either – you end up only a few popular windows-based servers that never fill up and are pretty boring… the game is great, no doubt… but with nobody to play with, what good is it?
I’d rather be playing Team Fortress 2, and since it runs in Wine… well – I don’t have much of a reason to keep running Vista, other than the fact that it was completely free (as in beer). I guess Microsoft can’t give away their operating system, since I’m going to perform a 7-pass-wipe to make sure I completely rid my computer of Vista.

So…. except for some sweet revenge there hasn’t been much to write about. Other than some content theft (par for the course when you’re a popular website) …

Long story short, some guy decided to steal my content and images, and I sent google a DMCA request to remove their advertisements from the page, they didn’t respond in a timely manner….. so I sent them a quick note that went something like this:

“Sup Google, thanks for the check this last week, I owe you one – stop by and check out my new tattoo, it’s badass personified. Oh yeah, also I faxed you a request about providing advertising for this jerk who is stealing my content – would you cut it out?”

Google replied something like this:

“If you would like to report a copyright infringement, please send us a properly formatted request.”

I replied,

“Don’t taze me bro! I already sent it to you.”

Google replied something like this:

“If you would like to report a copyright infringement, please send us a properly formatted request.”

So I figure the DMCA request is going nowhere fast, what is a guy to do? Enlist the help of his readers….

Not you guys!

I’ll enlist the help of the folks who just happen to be reading content that’s been stolen. I deleted my old image pointing to the entirely nasty HP Vectra slimline computer that runs my network (now running IPCop 1.4.18 to test out the latest release – trust me, it’s nothing special) and replaced it with a message to the readers of websites who steal my content.

And the thing that REALLY sucks… when searching for the name of the article, the website of the content theif shows up first. I guess it’s a bad case of Google’s algorithm for determining “duplicate content” and my website has been penalized… what a pain in the neck!

For your enjoyment… I’m not providing a hyperlink, since that would be kinda silly, but I bet you’ll enjoy this stuff.

It doesn’t quite fit with their website theme… but ah well, what can I do?

Fsckin Downtime, Contact Me, Bad News, And “Something” Is In The Pipe

Some maintenance around here was desperately needed… the site has been upgraded, so there may be some issues here and there. I’m aware of the dozens of articles that have no category.

If you see anything strange, use the brand spanking new Contact button on the left and scroll down, fill out the form, prove you’re a human, and by the miracle of technology, I will receive your message.

A couple of other changes are afoot. Continue reading Fsckin Downtime, Contact Me, Bad News, And “Something” Is In The Pipe