Categories
Humor

Need A Reason To Upgrade To Linux? How About This: Double Your Money Back Lifetime Guarantee!

Your eyes did not deceive you! Install Linux today and you’ll receive these great features:

  • Free Upgrades For Life!
  • Exclusive, Free Source Code Subscription!
  • Secure, Standards-Compliant, Wicked Fast Browsing with Firefox!
  • Free Support As Long As You Live!
  • No Extra Software Needed – Antivirus not needed, and Firewall Included!
  • Free, Easy, Background Updates!
  • Fast & Stable Computing Enviroment!
  • Over 20,000 Software Packages FREE OF CHARGE!

You’d probably expect to pay over $199 for a single upgrade from Microsoft, but we wont nickel and dime you to death – pay nothing – EVER!

But wait! Try out Linux today, and we’ll cut 100% off the asking price, and give away free installation CDs of the most user-friendly distribution of Linux around – Ubuntu – sent right to your home!

And if that weren’t enough, there are over 100 other distributions of Linux you can also use, 100% free to you, guaranteed! All you need is an internet connection!

And if you aren’t satisfied, you can try Linux risk-free for an average of 24,464 days – THAT’S 67 YEARS, INCLUDING 16 LEAP YEAR DAYS – our gift to you.

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For one easy payment of zero dollars and zero cents, Linux can be yours today! Don’t wait, download it now!

Categories
Humor Linux

How To Install Gutsy Gibbon – A 21 Step Guide For Technical Support

Ok, this is completely satirical, cynical and NOT serious at all. It’s meant to make you laugh. If you don’t laugh, you may have DVHAD (Digg Visitor Humor Absence Disorder). You may need to seek professional therapy. I can recommend a good psychiatrist if you’d like.

This article is 99.7% joke. (0.3% standard deviation)

1. “First, insert the Ubuntu Gutsy Gibbon 7.10 CD into your cup holder.”

Categories
Humor Linux

189 Funny UNIX Error Messages

I was searching around and I’ve compiled a list of *nix errors found on an old newsgroup archive, reformatted for your reading pleasure.

Which one is your favorite?

  1. “Values of B will give rise to dom.”
  2. FATAL system error #nnnn CAUSE: We should never get here!
  3. OHHHH…. I give up Core dumped
  4. COMPILER UNABLE TO ABORT
  5. AN ATTEMPT WAS MADE TO WRITE BEYOND THE MAXIMUM ASSIGNED SPACE FOR A MASS STORAGE FILE. AN ATTEMPT WAS MADE TO EXPAND A MASS STORAGE FILE BEYOND THE MAXIMUM ASSIGNED SPACE. A READ FUNCTION FOR A MASS STORAGE FILE SPECIFIED AN ADDRESS (WORD 5 OF THE I/O PACKET) THAT IS BEYOND THE MAXIMUM ASSIGNED SPACE. A READ OR WRITE FUNCTION FOR A WORD-ADDRESSABLE MASS STORAG FILE SPECIFIED A MASS STORAGE ADDRESS (WORD 5 OF THE I/O PACKET) AND A TOTAL DATA COUNT. WHEN THE MASS STORAGE ADDRESS IS ADDED TO THE TOTAL DATA COUNT, THE RESULTING ENDING MASS STORAGE ADDRESS IS GREATER THAN 2*/35-1. A READ OR WRITE FUNCTION FOR A SECTOR-FORMATTED MASS STORAGE FILE SPECIFIED A MASS STORAGE ADDRESS (WORD 5 OF THE I/O PACKET) THAT IS GREATER THAN 2*/30-1. ADI ONLY: REFERENCE ATTEMPTED BEYOND THE ASSIGNED FILE WHEN THE FILE IS CONFIGURED AS A FH-432 OR FH-1782 DRUM.
Categories
Humor Linux Video

This Guy Installs Linux In Places No Man Should

Every once in awhile I’ll post a worthy Linux-related video on the blog. I just watched this one tonight, and the acting was not great, but I laughed so hard when he installed the Linux File Server on the Toilet running on dial-up. LOL!